Mark it off

Transition SLR camera? Purchased. CHECK.

Primary behavioral research? Underway. CHECK.

Writing....well....baby steps in that direction. My brain works faster than my fingers sometimes.

Finally starting to get somewhere. Now I just need to keep the ball rolling. I'm nervous about a lot of things: my job, my writing, myself...this body I occupy doesn't seem to cut it most days anymore (for myself). I wish I could be that girl that is so confident about herself, but I'm just not. I never was. And it's too much work to try.

I miss Seattle. I want to tuck it away in my heart and hold onto it until I can go back. It made me feel so much better about me as a person, as a career woman, as someone who can make a difference in this world. Until then, I'll endure and keep wishing for better things to come.

So Long, My Heart Breaks

Almost a year? Seriously? Well. You didn't miss much.

I went to Seattle, my first dream in a long list.

And it was wonderful.

I learned so much, and everything is so much more different on the West Coast. Really anywhere but Florida is different/better.

I saw whales in the wild for the first time, and that alone was worth the trip. There's no speakable way to describe it besides....life changing. I'd never want to see them in any other place. The water, the wind, the islands, the mountains; seeing the babies breach from the water to play...absolutely glorious feeling.

The rest consisted of great music, great scenery, wonderful places, and a pretty bad ass rental car.

Flash forward to October.

I met Ryan's [dad's] family up in Wisconsin.

I had met Ryan's mom's side plenty of times, but Ryan's always said that his father's side was different. More like mine, crazy, loud, family oriented. I couldn't wait.

As soon as we arrived to Ryan's aunt's house, I didn't want to leave. His family very quickly accepted me for who I was, and even though it was only 2 days, it felt so much longer. I felt home...as a second home anyway. I can't wait to go back to see them.

Our first Christmas at home couldn't have been greater. After 4.5 years, the moms finally met. New Year's was calm and wonderful with close friends.

Birthday? Awesome birthday. Got minimally drunk for the first time, had all my friends there (I think the key is to make an event birthday related). Got my first designer bag AND tickets to Wicked. Nothing says birthday like style and Broadway.

And now switching to the present.

I've learned many things. Especially about people.

I don't have many friends, not many true ones. And really, the number of friends that I have that are not work employees can barely fit on one hand.

But at least the ones I have support my ambitions without having to brag horribly about their own. Let alone, on my birthday.

I think I need another Facebook friend cleanse.

But right now, I have to concentrate on my writing. If I can manage to finish something this year, and just manage to put it up on Kindle books, then I can hopefully just get a little notice. True friends will support me, or at the very least, just wish me luck.